Paris Hilton went to jail.
Paris Hilton got out of jail.
Paris Hilton went back to jail.
Screaming.
Her lawyer claims she was put on house arrest due to medical conditions. Intially the press said the medical condition could be summed up in one word: RASH. Playing the rash card never works. Trust me, Paris. I try and use it all the time to get out of stuff. "Sorry I'm late for work. I had a rash." "Sorry I forgot to pay you that ten bucks I owe you. I had a rash to take care of." "Sorry I forgot your birthday. See I have this rash..." "No, I don't understand all the intricacies of the Middle Eastern conflict. But I do have a rash."
And house arrest? In the Hilton Mansion? I want to be on house arrest there!

Summer is my time to catch up on reading. Of course, I'm supposed to be reading Pride and Prejudice with my friend Kari. I have a feeling neither one of us are working too hard on it. But since I need something to do while I'm ignoring P and P, here's what I'm reading:


All the Tea in China is a tale about an Englishwoman who stows away on a ship bound for the Orient so she can begin her life as a missionary. Then, oops, she gets caught (because it would be a dull book if she stayed hidden the entire 348 pages), and of course, falls in love with the ship's captain (Just once why can't the damsel in distress fall in love with a deck swabber? A lookout on the poop deck?). I'm not a big regency fan, but I liked the book. And the author did not survive to see it's release, so purchasing this book would definitely help our the young family she left behind. And I do love the cover.



I am half way through The Specialists: Model Spy. This brilliantly intelligent sixteen-year-old girl gets caught hacking into the government's computer system. Instead of going to prison, she gets recruited into a program for young smarties like herself, gets a new identity, and all but saves the world (while getting a boyfriend, I think). Oh, and she's model beautiful. This might as well be my life story. Sooo many similarities. The long legs, the hacking, the child prodigy issue, having to fight the dudes off with a stick. And of course looking like Giselle or Kate Moss while entering computer code and wearing bifocals. Besides the fact that the author clearly ripped this story from my life, it's a good book. Middle school audience though. So obviously I like it.

I'm listening to Michael Buble's Call Me Irresponsible. I especially like "Me and Mrs. Jones."
Though I don't know why. I'm not Mrs. Jones. My mom is. Still, that song will make anyone wish they were Mrs. Jones. But his real life lady love is the girl who played the total heifer with crazy eye shadow in Devil Wears Prada. That's not a good pic, but she had wild green eye shadow stripes everywhere. Mr. Buble, you sir, can do better than that. She's mean and she abuses the Mary Kay products. And probably does not appreciate the track "Me and Mrs. Jones." S'all
I'm saying.

If you, like me, have grown tired and weary of the war dominating the TV and news, wondering where has the good, quality, in-depth journalism gone--wonder no more. On the morn of June 18, Matt Lauer, who has not demonstrated his journalist chops since Tom Cruise got up in his glib face, will be interviewing my future relatives, Wills and Harry. You can check it out here. And who wouldn't?